busted lip, aching hip
a thigh run across with a shallow frankenstein cut and a fading bruise
anne and tina say
"bruises should not result from this work."
a tenet i have clearly discarded

the thing is
they've promised to tie me up
in front of several audiences this summer
ankles lashed to wrists
with ribbon and lace
and I am excited.

the clown who puts the kick me sign on her own back

somethin cool,

specially if you're biking-inclined
or geography-inclined

http://www.heywhatsthat.com/profiler.html

may's a-flurry

home-to-home!
i left oakland on sunday night, after two weeks of preparation--bike building (spend FOUR HOURS tuning my front derailleur and now it mostly works but of course when you load a bike up with like 50 lbs of shit everything is a little different), packing, repacking, saying goodbye, sweeping my room so someone else can live there and call it theirs. i kept telling teresino they could move stuff in while i was still there but i think they needed to wait until i left, until the room was really empty...but they still came by every day to water plants and give me a big hug. we had a kind of thing but it was all very ambiguous and so when we said goodbye they gave me some quizzical looks but i'm never sure how much to make a summary story and how much to leave things open-ended, allow our stories to develop separately...
anyway,
after my goodbye party friday night (packets of stuff in tin foil in a fire, hella drunk kids from fancy house) i kinda disappeared, running around and helping build a chicken coop and celebratory beers for everything.
sunday i got an amtrak up to eugene
kevin helped me pack up my bike at the station, hung out on the tracks talking about hot mess and dreams and travelling and king cobra
i slept most of the way and felt bad about it cause the view was so beautiful--the starlight line i think--ate hummus and that funny gjetoast scandanavian cheese
woke up in eugene, packed up & took off!
i rode about 50 miles that day, starting around 1:30 and through lots of little towns and big fields...i managed to get lost only in the small cities (eugene then albany then hella lost in the outskirts of pdx)
constantly amazed that my bike was holding up, heavy as fuck with all of these things i thought i'd need
thrilled at first to have occasion to be eating granola bars and wheat gluten jerky and emergen-c for every meal
mostly excited to be on the open road
i biked around albany like 4 times and a cute girl at a coffee shop gave me a consolatory italian soda while i looked for the way out. finally found the bridge out of town and contemplated pitching my tent on the golf course, then instead asked some folks if i could camp in their yard and got 2 compassionate "no's" before someone said "yes."
hunkered down with "the some of parts" by t.cooper and a black butte porter...
after i was asleep some cops showed up with shiny lights and inquisitive faces asking what i was doing there; after i said i had permission they proceeded to ask where i was going, coming from, how long since i'd left pennsylvania, if i went to school, if i finished school, what i studied, where i'd lived...what what what. i was still mostly asleep and confused but eventually they left.
next morning (yesterday) started out at 7, biked about 110 miles! thought it was supposed to be only 90 but i got lost in lake oswego (wow i hate suburbs and cars wowow). the hills got worse (literally, topographically) as i got tireder and the worst stretch was near wilsonville, probably 60 miles in, 20 miles on a curvy road with lots of speeding cars and NO SHOULDER. once some bros in a car swerved and screamed "get the fuck off the road" and that shook me up, made me want to write "share the road - i don't want to die" on the back of my panniers. or i dunno, put up some guerrilla signs or something. such entitlement.
so! i made it to pdx exhausted, displeased with the city after arriving through its suburbs, now up in the north-northeast with bernard and c80 and other folks in a sleepy smoky beautiful house for a couple days till i head up to washington. i'm excited to get back on my bike and feel that freedom of movement.
love to all!

PRE-ASPIRATION INSTRUCTIONS

4. Please try to have a bowel movement the evening before or the morning of your procedure.



...and here I fail. I only have 7 hours left to prove myself.

Recipe for getting laid

Getting Laid Chili Truffles (GF)

Base Ingredients

· Unsweetened cocoa

· About 1 cup flour. A combination sweet sorghum flour and tapioca flour works well, or I bet coconut flour would work, too.

· Hannah Spice

· Chili Powder

· Cloves, or Cardamom, or neither.

· ½ cup sugar

· ½ tsp salt

· ¼ cup unsalted Land-o-Lakes butter

· 6 oz bittersweet chocolate, finely chopped. Or, substitute unsweetened chocolate and increase sugar.

· 2 large whole eggs

Ganache Ingredients

· 2 large egg yolks

· 1 cup heavy cream

· 1/8 tsp salt

· 12 oz bittersweet chocolate, finely chopped (or substitute unsweetened chocolate and add sugar).

· Hannah Spice

· Dried chili pepper seeds

Base Directions

· Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Butter enough wax paper to cover the bottom and sides of an 8x8” metal baking pan, dust with cocoa powder and knock out excess.

· Melt butter in a saucepan (or tiny pot), then remove from heat. Add chocolate and whisk until smooth. Add Hannah Spice, chili powder, and other spices if desired. Add eggs 1 at a time, whisking until smooth. Stir in flour.

· Spread batter evenly in baking pan. Bake for 15-20 minutes, until it’s firm but not yet crumbly. Remove from oven and allow pan to cool, at least 2 hours.

Ganache Directions

· Lightly beat yolks in a bowl. Save whites for something else – maybe hollandaise sauce?

· In a saucepan or tiny pot, combine cream with salt. Bring it to a boil, stirring constantly.

· Gradually add cream to the beaten yolks, whisking constantly (if you have two people) or consistently (if you have one).

· Pour the cream/salt/egg mixture back into the saucepan and whisk over low heat until slightly thickened. Do NOT let boil.

· Remove from heat and add chocolate and Hannah Spice, whisking until smooth.

· Pour ganache over the cooled truffle base, while still in the pan, and smooth using a spatula or the back of a metal spoon.

· Sprinkle dried chili pepper seeds across the top of the truffles, so each square inch of truffle has at least a few seeds. This way, they’re beautiful and also clearly spicy. How terrible it would be to bite into a spicy truffle expecting it to be sweet!

· I wonder if paprika would work, for decorating. It’s worth trying. Let me know what you think.

· Press seeds (and paprika, if you like. Or flower petals, or a poem) into the ganache using the back of a metal spoon.

· Cover and chill for at least 5 hours.

· Cut chilled truffles into squares and arrange Adèle-ish-ly. This is when the wax paper comes in handy, so you can lift them all out of the pan at once!

· Feed these to someone with your fingers. Then lick off the excess chocolate. Mmmm.