i can stand in the wind and
i am not taken away by it
with only my name now

the leaves look delicious as ever
our sun slants halos around us
only this time,
oh you are beautiful and ordinary
beautiful because you are ordinary

i begged for something so different
on the nights i fought to hear
some prophecy coming in on the wind
i was wrong!

i am my name now
how good to have a name
to find the light
in a word just for me

i am not your predator

look in my eyes

the key to my freedom resides between my thighs

it is not a flower

it is not a trap

it has only a fraction the pain associated with your mother's lap

i am a whole being

i bleed and i cry

i fucking fuck when i want to and not as much as i try

so why do i get stabbed with the knives of slut shame

why do i get snubbed and taken to blame

when my heart is so open

all i wanna do is listen to your days

when my true orifice is my soul

and i can feel all your pain

is it because i have long hair?

is it because all the stupid men want me out there?

you think i want that?

it's not a power; it's a drain

that they are so disconnected from sources of love

they have to drive those like me insane

i am not a magazine cut-out; i am not a patriarchal tool

i am a woman trying to unwind the spool

of history to find her own story so long now

ommitted

committed to shards of an urn that once told what it was to have breasts

and think them holy and to be soft and round and not feel that unsafe

and to be wiser than wisdom for crying out loud

for crying out loud

FOR CRYING OUT LOUD

because that is something women are good at

and doing so at this point of the world's eco-political evolution would be really wise indeed

i am digging the word Goddess out from images, tarot cards and consumeristic BS

to find something simple

like peace and something sacred to the spark

that makes me, well, me

i have fought tooth and nail to have a voice

and not just one that trails off like "right?"

i have fought hard to look my sisters in the eye

and more often than not, they look away

or don't want me to call them "sister" or "girl" ; I have to wonder why

have they been shamed out of knowing girls too can grunt and sigh?

have they been shamed out of finding roses beautiful,

having slumber parties all night

and acknowledging that even kesha holds a bright light?

i am not the virgin mary; her patience beyond mine
i am not britney; she too had tolerance for days

no, i am the fox and i demand the story change
that we all be free
and we keep it that way

because when you say that girl is a mess

what i hear is thousands of years of control

what i hear is what's not being told

that you want her small and to know her place

that you want her right where you can see her and to stay that way
we can all live through trial and error and failure is okay

but not if you are female

and you take up all that space

when i hear that girl is a mess

it is because i am doing what i want

because i dare to feel everything

and to hide nothing away

because i expose my naked tits and stir up all your shame

and there it is, a mess

but in truth, it's just exposure, and we all want nothing. less.

"right?"